TikTok might be going away. Here's how to deal with the stress of that possibility:
“How do I live without you?
I want to know
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?”
The words LeAnn Rimes sang in her hit song, “How Do I Live” were originally written from the perspective of someone who simply couldn’t function if their lover ever left them.
Turns out the feelings might be even stronger about TikTok.
If you started feeling a bit stressed when you heard about the news that the FCC asked that TikTok be removed from Apple and Google app stores, you’re not alone. The app has become a ubiquitous presence in the lives of millions of people - the average user spends 40 minutes per day on it, and the news of its potential ban has horrified individual users and business owners alike.
Anything (or any person, for that matter) we invest that much daily time with will become connected to us at the level of our brain chemistry. TikTok is basically a dopamine vending machine, with each new video giving us another hit of the happy chemical. So the prospect of losing something we’re that tied to will naturally cause stress and anxiety. So what can we do? I’m a mental health therapist who has over 800,000 followers on the app, so I’ve had to manage the stress of this news myself. Here’s how I’m dealing with it:
Get a new “drug dealer” on standby
TikTok is a major source of the “drugs” our brain produces - dopamine, serotonin, endorphins, oxytocin - to make us feel good. We open the app so often each day that our brains eventually feel a compulsion to keep going back to it in order to get those chemicals. But you can retrain your brain to realize it doesn’t need an app, or even a screen, to get them. Healthy ways of boosting dopamine include:
listening to music you like
eating foods such as pineapple, cheese, turkey, eggs, and salmon
exercise (even just a 5 minute walk)
sunlight
It’s not you, TikTok, it’s me
It isn’t actually TikTok that you’d miss. It’s what TikTok does for you - the needs it’s meeting. Maybe the need for entertainment, learning, laughter, validation, or connection with others. Those are healthy needs. What are some ways you can meet them in other ways? Of course there will be another app that comes along, or an existing app that fills the gap, but apps only give us an artificial version of connection. Maybe take five minutes to call a friend you haven’t caught up with in a while. You’ll feel more connected and satisfied.
What if it works out better?
For people whose businesses rely on TikTok, this question reminds your brain that the situation might turn out better rather than worse. We assume it will turn out badly, but that’s a flawed thinking pattern called “fortune telling”. The truth is we simply don’t know the future. For example, TikTok’s absence could open the door for an opportunity or possibility you wouldn’t have had if you were still counting on Tiktok to come through for you.
Trey Tucker is a speaker and licensed mental health therapist and founder of Rugged Counseling. You can find him and his over 800,000 followers on TikTok (for now, at least), Instagram, YouTube, and Clapper.