Why Celebrities Quietly Quit
Celebrities are pulling back from their careers to improve their health. Stars like Demi Lovato, Justin Bieber, Shawn Mendes, and Jonah Hill have recently publicly announced their mental or physical health battles and their decision to cancel tours or pull back from their careers in general.
The actors and musicians I work with tell me privately that almost everyone in their industry is depressed, has anxiety, or both. I’ve noticed a few main reasons for this. They don’t all apply to everyone, but these are some common root issues of why we’re seeing more cancellations:
Lack of Fulfillment
They’ve worked incredibly hard and achieved the career success they wanted, but it didn’t fulfill them. It didn’t bring the joy, satisfaction, and meaning they thought it would. It actually left them empty, with a thought like, “Is this all there is?” Depression becomes almost inevitable when that realization happens.
Identity & Value
Before they achieved their success, they never figured out who they were and didn’t develop a sense of self-worth, so the role they play as an actor or musician temporarily becomes their identity and source of validation. Therefore, as long as they’re in their character or on the concert stage, they feel ok. They feel significant, even loved, at a superficial level; and they get to escape the insecurities and uncertainties for awhile.
So the performance essentially becomes a drug, and they only feel like themselves, feel truly alive, when they’re performing. But when the show is over they crash back down to reality. That can become a truly deadly cycle, and the artists who realize that often decide to step away from it and do the inner work to grow and get healthy.Their “Why”
Many times, they’ve lost their “why” - their reason for doing what they do. Or their “why” wasn’t a healthy, fulfilling reason in the first place, and that fact finally came to the surface. Especially once they’ve reached a certain level of fame and financial success, they no longer feel challenged, and creative people especially need challenge in order to stay inspired and motivated to keep growing. You see that in the recent Elvis movie, when Elvis realized he was stuck with his manager, Tom Parker, and that he wouldn’t be allowed to take on true acting roles, he gave up on the inside and dove even deeper into the pills to numb out. He lost the artistic challenge he needed and felt stuck.
Pressure
Nothing is ever “good enough” in their industry, and therefore it’s difficult for the person to feel like they’re good enough. The record company always wants the next album to top the success of the previous release. The movie producer needs the actor to propel the movie to an even bigger box office total than the one before. They’re essentially a part inside a machine, and the machine is always focused on the next thing. Also, the pressure of comparison to their competition weighs heavily on them.
“Yes men”
They often wind up surrounded by people who need them and the financial benefits they provide. It creates a power dynamic where the people around them don’t have the position or the courage to tell the celebrity the hard truths they need to hear. It creates an isolation effect in which the celebrity is surrounded by their “entourage” but has no one who’s a true peer to speak into their life.
Celebrities are people too
And they have shockingly similar problems to non-celebrities. They have dating conflicts, tension in their marriages, children who stress them out, and work-related pressures and expectations. Celebrities tend to have a disproportionately high amount of childhood trauma, and the pain that still lingers from it is often both a source of their immense creativity and also an anchor around their neck that drags them down.
Quiet Quitting vs. Hustle Culture
“Hustle culture” isn’t altogether negative. It’s just incomplete. Reaching any worthwhile goal takes incredible amounts of hard work and sacrifice. But the myth is that a meaningful life is waiting at the end of that path of hustling. We need to build a meaningful life from the inside out, then we can start to hustle from a foundation of fulfillment and joy rather than seeking it from the external success we crave.
Celebrities are increasingly willing to place their career lower on their priority list in order to address their mental health. They’ve seen through the empty promise of “hustle culture.” They’ve been hustling with the belief that, “I’ll be happy when I reach the top of the mountain,” but when the get to the top of the mountain they find out it was a bait and switch. Being famous didn’t fix the unhappiness, pain, and emptiness because wherever you go, you bring yourself with you. You’re still unfulfilled; you’re just unfulfilled with more money.
Always “On”
Every celebrity I’ve worked with said attention gets old a lot faster than you think. They’re often conflicted because they craved the attention, and they appreciate their fans, but at the same time they get tired of being “on” all the time. Their bodies stay in a kind of fight or flight state because they know people are watching, videoing, and potentially scrutinizing their every move.
When fans realize their favorite artist has worries, insecurities, pain, and arguments with loved ones just like they do, they can imagine what it might be like to carry all that around inside through a day while simultaneously having to essentially be “in character” as a celebrity. It’s twice the amount of emotional energy required.
Your Own Burnout
It’s easier to prevent burnout than heal from it. Catch it early by regularly taking what I call the ENP test - Energy, Negativity, and Productivity. If you’re consistently feeling a lack of energy, negative or cynical, and less productive even when you’re physically rested, you’re heading toward burnout.
To heal from burnout we first have to reasses our priorities. The reason we burned out in the first place is because we contradicted what we said we prioritized. The brain can’t sustain that level of conflict, and burnout is the result.
We also need to reorganize our time to reflect those values, and we need accountability partners to hold us to the new schedule. Start with small changes at first so you’re more likely to follow through. And prioritize people and activities that recharge you rather than drain you.
Healing from burnout also requires healthy choices in three areas of self-care: sleep, exercise, and nutrition. Like a stool with three legs, if one leg is out of balance, the whole stool can collapse.
Want to Know More?
In this interview with Trey Tucker, PopSugar discusses “Are Stars "Quiet Quitting," Too? Demi Lovato and Others Show Us Everyone Should Prioritize Health”. Read the article here.
